Dreams: Part Four 
"Blue Faith"

Mystic Kitty (MK) Death

~~~~~

Disclaimer: Let me see, the owner and script writer of Digimon is writing fanfiction..?
...RIGHT

Koushiro, as soon as he got home, ran into his room, flung off his bag and jumped into his bed, sobbing bitterly. His door was left wide open, but he did not care. He had dropped his bag carelessly against his dresser and might of damaged the equipment in there however he did not care. He did not care about much of anything now.
Except.
Jyou would not even look at him. He said nothing. Nothing.
'I thought..that you loved me? I thought..that you would do anything for me..?'
'So why didn't you stand up to your father?'

Jyou had locked his door, taken off his glasses and sobbed bitterly into his pillow. There was no telling what his father was going to do now. Would he phone the Izumi residence? Would he get Koushiro in trouble? Would he ground him? Would he never let him see Koushiro again?
Would...would his father tear Koushiro out of his life?
'No....God, no, please, anything..' Jyou prayed silently.
'Anything...but Koushiro...'

Koushiro's mother looked in on Koushiro tentatively, flinching at the site of seeing her beloved Koushiro crying away. 'Should I leave him alone...?'
When she heard a soft, pain-filled sob that whispered Jyou's name, she decided that the last thing that Koushiro needed right now was to be alone.
Koushiro's mother walked in and placed a hand on Koushiro's head. "Koushiro.."
"Mom.." Koushiro suddenly turned around and threw himself in his mother's arms. He clutched at her, needing something to touch, something to hold onto. Something to make sure he did not vanish into oblivion. "Mom..." Koushiro sobbed again.
"What's the matter, Koushiro..?" Mom soothed him, holding him, stroking his hair. She asked, however, she had a fairly good idea of what was the matter.
'You're so warm, Mom.' Koushiro thought, and smiled just a little. 'Just like Jyou..' the same smile vanished and transformed into another sob.
"Koushiro.." Mom patted his back. "Breath in, calm down, and tell me what happened..."
"Mom...Jyou...I..." Koushiro looked up, tears still spilling down his cheeks.

"Jyou, you alright?" a voice came from the door. That voice.
'Not now..' Jyou groaned inwardly. "Go away, Shin."
'What the hell did Dad say to him?' Shin pondered. He would of taken Jyou's order, however, recognized the note of a sob in Jyou's throat. "Are you crying?"
"Go away..." Jyou's voice sounded small and weak. "Please..."
"If I have to get Dad to open this door..." Shin warned, playing on Jyou's fear. Instantly, the door opened and Jyou ran back to his bed, burying his face in his pillows. Away from Shin's prying eyes.
"Jyou, what's the matter?" Shin asked, raising an eyebrow.
"......" Jyou clutched at his pillow. The same pillow where Koushiro had been awhile ago. His fingers grasped around a single thread of red hair. Koushiro's hair.
"What the hell happened, Jyou? Why was Dad so mad?" Shin furrowed his eyebrows in frustration. He reached out and shook Jyou's shoulder. "Listen, Jyou-"
"Don't touch me!" Jyou almost screeched. He pulled away violently, and slammed up against the wall. His eyes were red and his cheeks tear-stained, while his fists clenched angrily.
"You look like a wreck..." Shin said softly. "Jyou, what happened?"
Jyou took a deep breath. "Shin, I'm -"

"-gay." Koushiro sighed. 'I just made up with my mother and now she has a reason to push me away.'
"And in love with Jyou, right?" Koushiro's mother smiled.
His eyes widened in shock. "How did you-" Koushiro's mind flashed back to when Jyou had called earlier. His mother had never left the room! And he had been looking at those pictures, so she must of...
Koushiro's face turned a deep shade of red. Mom smile never left her face.
"Actually, I knew before today. I think I knew when you and Jyou first met."
"R...really? How?" Koushiro was stunned, needless to say. 'If she's known all this time, she knew before anyone else knew, even before me and Jyou knew..'
"Mother's intuition.." a mysterious smile crossed her face. Mysterious, motherly knowledge gleamed in her loving eyes. "So then, what happened? Did you fight with Jyou?"
"Not really..." Koushiro sighed again, snuggling up to his mother. "What happened was.."

"And that's what happened." Jyou sighed, crossing his arms. He had wiped his eyes clean and replaced his glasses. However, not even the gilded frame could hide the remorse in his eyes.
Shin shrugged. "Well, I always kinda figured you were but I never said anything."
"HUH?!" Jyou jumped, shocked.
"Well c'mon Jyou. You trying to say it's not obvious? You have to be a real moron not to notice." Shin then slapped his forehead with his realization. "And mom and dad never...well..I always kind of figured that, too..."
Jyou had to chuckle. Shin had a good point. "Well...now Dad's totally pissed off with me. What should I do, Shin?"
"For one, stop blubbering. You're a man, Jyou! You should act like one." Shin said, slapping Jyou's shoulder. Jyou rubbed his shoulder and nodded.
"For two, stop cowering under Dad. Stand up to him, for once. This is your life, not his."
Jyou nodded slowly. 'Easier said than done, though...'
"And finally." Shin placed his hand on Jyou's shoulder and squeezed it. "Jyou, it's high time that you realized and accepted what it is that you want in your life." Shin turned around to look at the image on Jyou's computer screen. "And Jyou, it's a little obvious what it is that you want..."
Jyou looked up at the computer screen and nodded. "You're right..I do know what I want.."
Jyou got off his bed and walked out of his room, ready to face his oppressor.

*RING*RING*
"The telephone.." Koushiro's mother announced softly as she held a sleeping Koushiro. After all of his tears and relating, he had fallen asleep in her arms. She was smiling and stroking his hair, rubbing his back. She did not want to leave him, however she did have to answer that phone...
Mrs.Izumi got up gently and laid Koushiro on his bed properly, covering him up with his blanket. She walked over to phone and read the call display. "Kido, Suichirou."
Mrs.Izumi sighed and picked up the phone. "Moshi moshi?"
"Hello, Mrs.Izumi." She recognized the cold voice of the father of the boy that Koushiro dearly loved.
"Hello, Mr.Kido." Mrs.Izumi replied calmly.
Koushiro raised his head up groggily, at first realizing that his mother was gone, then realizing that she had just said "Mr.Kido" into the phone. He felt numb.
"How're you, Mrs.Izumi?" Mr.Kido made an attempt to sound civil.
"Fine. And you?" Mrs.Izumi was not fooled by false kindness for a minute.
Koushiro stood by the door to his room, listening in on the conversation.
"I'm fine. Actually, I called to talk to you about something." Mr.Kido sounded upset.
"Oh, what did you want to discuss?" Mrs.Izumi was firm, determined to not let this man's yelling upset her. No matter how much of a jerk he was.
Koushiro's heart slowed down to a crawl.
"About your son touching my son." Mr.Kido almost growled, trying his best not to yell.
"And?" Mrs.Izumi smiled sweetly. "Is there a problem with that?"
"Yes." Mr.Kido replied, sounding shocked.
"What is this problem?" Mrs.Izumi asked calmly.
"Just that...that your boy was practically fondling mine!"
"Was it against Jyou's will?" Mrs.Izumi was about to start yelling at Mr.Kido's ignorance.
Koushiro's heart was skipping beats. His mother was defending him against Mr.Kido?
"......" Mr.Kido's silence spoke volumes.
"Jyou is your son, Mr.Kido." Mrs.Izumi said gently. "In today's world, there are many children who are neglected and ignored. They are misunderstood and very lonely. Why? Because parents do not love them and accept them for who they are."
Mr.Kido's loud, angry breath could be heard.
Koushiro smiled. 'Mom..'
"So I should hope that, if Jyou is your son, that you can love and accept him for who he is." Mrs.Izumi hung up the phone with a brief *click*.
Koushiro stood up and walked out to greet his mother. "Thank you, mom.."
Mrs.Izumi turned around and smiled at Koushiro. "Anytime, sweetie." She hugged Koushiro. 'Besides, I never liked that man anyhow.'

Jyou swallowed the lump in his throat and walked into the living room. He was determined to tell his father once and for all who was the boss in his life.
As he approached the living room, he noticed that his father frowned and slammed the phone down, grumbling.
Jyou cleared his throat. "Father."
His father turned on his with eyes of sheer steel. "It would seem that Mrs.Izumi has been quite an influence with your new trend, Jyou." Mr.Kido sat down in his favourite arm chair and picked up a newspaper.
'Did Koushiro tell Mrs.Izumi...? Was he that upset..?' Jyou thought, then he felt like he had been cut through with a knife. 'Koushiro...' he thought, his hand wandering to the scar on his side. A scar that he had received in the name of love. A scar to remind him of what he wanted, treasured, and refused to give up.
"Anyhow, Jyou, I think you have too much time on your hands." Mr.Kido switched the page in his newspaper. "So I have arranged plans for you to go to a summer camp based on programs towards becoming a medial doctor."
Jyou took a deep breath. "No."
"What was that?" Mr.Kido was still not looking at Jyou. He was reading the mutual funds section of the newspaper.
"No, I'm not going to your summer camp." Jyou said more firmly, more clearly.
"Jyou, that was not a request." Mr.Kido skimmed through the mutual funds section.
"I know, I was not making one. I was telling you what is happening." Jyou narrowed his gaze at his father. 'He never talks to me, just at me.'
Mr.Kido put his newspaper down calmly and looked at Jyou. "Pardon me?"
"I said, I'm not going to your summer camp."
"Why not?"
"Because I don't want to. I don't want to be a doctor, either."
"Since when has what you want had anything to do with this?" Jyou's father turned away, ready to pick up his newspaper again.
"It's always mattered, this is my life and I have a right to choose what to do with it." Jyou walked up closer to his father.
Mr.Kido's eyes turned on Jyou coldly. "While you live under my house, you live under my rules, and you do as I say."
"Father, you can't just sit there and deny the facts. It's not practical."
Mr.Kido was very silent.
"I've never wanted to be a doctor. I've always wanted to be a marine biologist because I love the sea and sea animals and I would love to study them for the rest of my life. I don't care how much money I make because money is nothing compared to my own personal happiness!"
Jyou's father continued to eye the newspaper, never looking his son in the eye. "Do you want me to kick you out for your disobedience?"
"I love Koushiro, father. Nobody will ever change that. Not Shin, not mother, and especially not you." Jyou clenched his fists. "If you want to kick me out for being true to myself, go ahead. I wouldn't want to live somewhere where I couldn't breathe anyway." Jyou turned around to return to his room, to get his things, and to leave.
"If you walk out that door, you can never come back." Mr.Kido's cold and angry voice came to Jyou.
"But if I stay here, I'll never see Koushiro again." Jyou said quietly, returning to his room, packing his most valued treasures, including his secret box, and walked towards the main entrance to his apartment.
"Jyou.." Shin said quietly.
"Goodbye, Shin." Jyou replied quietly as he walked out the door.

The door closed shut, now he was on his own. Now he was out in the streets like the everyday bum. However, it was better to a bum with freedom than to be a prisoner with a house. Besides..

Jyou looked up to the sky. The rain was pouring hard on his face, but he did not care. All he cared about now was...
"Koushiro.." Jyou whispered the sweetest name he had ever known in his lifetime, as he walked off down the road to his destiny.

Dreams: Part Five 
"You've got a friend in me"

"Some other folks might be
A little bit smarter than I am
Bigger and stronger too
Maybe
But none of them will ever love you
The way I do
-"You've got a friend in me" by Randy Newman

The rain had started to pour down through his shirt and now his clothes stuck to him. However the rain was not enough to drone out the tears coming from his eyes. Tears, for leaving his home, and for fear of losing Koushiro for the rest of his life.

He was sneezing a little as he ran through the rain, squinting through his fog covered glasses. He had to get to his house. He had to make it up to him. He was all he had left, now..

'But aren't you kidding yourself...?' Jyou thought to himself grimly. 'He's all you've EVER had..'
'That's right...Koushiro's all I've ever had...'
'If I lose him now, I'll die...'

Koushiro was curled up in his bed, sleeping. Trying to, anyhow. His thoughts were full of Jyou, of his cheerful smile, his thoughtful fussing..
His sweet embrace, his warm kisses...
Koushiro winced and buried himself further in his bed sheets. What did it matter, now? Jyou would never stand up to his father. Jyou would not hold him now, or love him or be with him.
Koushiro cringed and bit his tongue. 'No more tears. I don't want to cry anymore. I just want..to get on with my life..
'My life..without Jyou...' Koushiro closed his eyes and hid from the world around, from harsh reality, from his harsh reality without Jyou. Without Jyou. Jyou.
'Jyou...I love you...'
'Can I really let you go from my heart...?'

Jyou finally got to Koushiro's apartment building. 'Will he forgive me..?' Jyou paced around for a bit inside the lobby, pondering whether or not to buzz the Izumi apartment. 'Only one way to find out...'

Bzz. Bzzz.
"I wonder who that could be...?" Mrs.Izumi wondered out loud to herself. She put the towel that she had been using to dry dishes with down and walked to the front door. Before she went to answer the buzzer, she glanced in on Koushiro, curled up on his bed. 'Oh honey...' she thought whimsically as she went to the buzzer and pressed the button.
"Moshi moshi?" she asked politely.
"Mrs.Izumi!" at first the owner of the voice jumped, then settled down. "Uh...hi!"
Mrs.Izumi smiled gently. "Hello, Jyou."
"Umm..hi!" Mrs.Izumi could imagine him blushing him now. Jyou swallowed on his end and continued. "Is...is Koushiro there....?"
"His body is, where his mind is I'm not sure, I'll ask." Mrs.Izumi said sadly, turning around to Koushiro's room. "Koushiro, sweetie?"
"....yeah.." there was a sniffle.
"Jyou is here, in the lobby."
Koushiro froze where he was. Half with sadness, half with happines. The clashing of these emotions made him somewhat paralysed in his speech.
"Did you want him to come see you...?" Mrs.Izumi asked slowly, sighing softly.
At first Koushiro made no response, and although he said nothing his head moved downward slightly as to nod, or so Mrs.Izumi saw it. She smiled softly. She returned to the buzzer box.
"Come on up, Jyou." she replied warmly, letting go of the buzzer button.

"THANK YOU!" the shivering cold Jyou yelled into a box that was no longer listening. He ran over to the elevator. 'Uh..first floor, first floor..' Jyou reminded himself as he pressed the elevator button. When it came by, he ran in and pressed the button for the first floor, shivering. After it seemed like an eternity to reach the first floor (more like a minute), he ran around the first floor, trying to remember where Koushiro's apartment was. 'I was only here earlier today and I already forgot...' Jyou smiled. 'Guess I was preoccupied..'

Finally Jyou remember the apartment number, and by that time it was easy to track him for there was a trail of water in his wake.
Mrs.Izumi opened the door of her apartment to see a drowned rat who had once upon a time been Jyou. Jyou bowed nervously and started to explain.
"Hi, Mrs.Izumi! Sorry I'm so wet it's just that I got really mad at my father which I'll go into later and then I left and forgot to take my umbrella with me!" Jyou laughed nervously as he bowed, a little puddle of water forming at his feet.
"Jyou!" Mrs.Izumi gasped. "Get in here right away and warm up!" Mrs.Izumi almost dragged Jyou inside, Jyou not being in any shape to argue with her.
"Take those shoes and socks off this instant, Jyou!" Mrs.Izumi commanded as she wandered into a room. Jyou looked up at the sign near it and read out the name. "Koushiro.." he whispered, his heart aching with guilt and sadness.


 

"You're about the same height as Jyou, right sweetie?" She grabbed Koushiro by his hand and took him out to face Jyou in order to judge the difference in height. Koushiro looked up at Jyou numbly while Jyou winced, for there were obvious signs on Koushiro's face that Koushiro had been crying.
"Well, if worst comes to worst, one of your shirt might actually fit Jyou properly." Mom said softly. "Koushiro, sweetie, do me a favour and get some of your clothes out for Jyou? He'll become very ill if he doesn't warm up."
Mom then pushed Jyou over to the bathroom and shut the door. "Jyou, take a shower and use one of the towels in there, Koushiro will bring you some dry clothes, ok?"
"B-but it's--" Jyou stammered, knocking on the door. 'Taking a shower with Koushiro around? This is his house! Even...even if he's mad at me...it'd still be embarassing..'
"No buts! Take a shower and warm up or else." Mrs.Izumi ordered, then she walked over to Koushiro and patted his head. His numb expression never left his face.
"Sweetheart.." Mom said, hugging Koushiro. "I know how much he means to you, and I would hate for you two to split up over Mr.Kido..." she kissed him on the cheek. "And he might become really sick unless he warms up."
"You're starting to sound like him, Mom.." Koushiro chuckled a little. 'Jyou's such a hypochondriac...'
"Oh well, mother knows best." She stood up and started to walk away. "Bring me his wet clothes, will you? I'll dry them off for him, and make him some hot tea."
"Can I have some tea too?" Koushiro asked.
Mom looked at Koushiro. "You never drink tea unless..." she trailed off. "Alright, sweetie. Cookies too?"
"Please." Koushiro managed to smile as he went to complete his task.

"A shower..in his house.." Jyou said nervously to himself. "Well, I-I just won't take long. It won't be like it was at the baths."
Jyou peeled his wet clothes from his body and stepped into the shower, turning on the warm water. 'If it's too hot I'll burn my skin.' He left his glasses on the bathroom sink, and his mind wandered back to the one time at the baths.

Jyou quietly wrapped a towel around himself, putting his glasses in a safe place. 'Koushioro's going to be there..so..I can't make a scene of myself.' Jyou's cheeks turned bright red. 'Koushiro is going to be...naked...aah...'
Jyou quickly walked over to the bath entrance. He took a deep breath, then opened the door.
"Uh..may I join you..?" Jyou asked nervously, glancing over in Koushiro's direction who, thankfully, was looking away.
"Jyou, you're so girly. I wonder if you're even a guy?" Yamato snickered.
Taichi opened his eyes. "Huh?"
"Let's find out, hmm?" Yamato grinned.
Taichi grinned. "All right!" The boys leapt out of the water and ran towards Jyou.
"Uh..Uh..What are you doing?!" Jyou shrieked as the other two boys started to pull at the towel.
"What are they doing..?" Patamon asked innocently, unaware of what human male nature was like.
"I don't understand humans at all.." Tentomon shook his head.
"Hey!! HEY!!! STOP IT!!" Jyou yelled as the towel flew off and fell gracefully to the ground. He was blushing a deep shade of red, and glancing at Koushiro, silently praising God that Koushiro was not paying attention.
Suddenly Gomamon came flying over the top of the wall, colliding with him head on. "Ouch.." Jyou groaned as he collapsed to the ground, the other boys laughing at him. 'As long as Koushiro wasn't watching...'

Koushiro had pulled out some clothes for Jyou, ones which he had never worn because they were not his colours. Dark blue button up shirt, black jeans which were too long on him however would probably fit Jyou.
'How strange I own clothing that is more suited for Jyou...' Koushiro mused as he folded them up into an easy to carry load and walked towards the bathroom. He stopped before the door and thought for a minute.
'What if he's just coming out? What if I see something..something I shouldn't be looking at...?' Koushiro swallowed and put his hand on the doorknob. 'Calm down, Koushiro, it's not going to be like it was at the baths...'

Koushiro was washing his face with the cloth, trying to clear the image of Tentomon shedding his skin from his mind. 'Eww...' Koushiro though as he then imagined himself doing something like that.
That was when he heard the quiet voice of Jyou: "Uh..may I join you..?"
Koushiro immediately glanced at Jyou's towel and then turned around, ashamed that he would be thinking about even looking there! That was disrespecting Jyou's privacy! Privacy...pri..
Koushiro dunked his head under water for a minute and then resurfaced, making to wash his hair. He could hear Yamato and Taichi teasing Jyou for a minute and then tried to stop himself from looking back occasionally, listening as Jyou started to yell at them.
Then his eyes glanced back as Jyou's towel went flying, and then he dunked his head under water again. 'No, no, NO, I am NOT going to look.'
'It's bad enough to have such thoughts, however I am NOT going to act upon them.'
'I am NOT going to act upon these thoughts.'
'I'm not..'

Jyou then decided that he had thoroughly washed the rain water from his body. He turned the taps off and reached his hand out to grab the white towel which he had made sure he had before even stepping into the shower. He pulled it in, wrapped it around himself, and stepped out of the shower just as the door opened.
Koushiro walked in, clutching clothing that was meant for him. He glanced over at Jyou and blushed.
For a moment Jyou lost his grip on his towel and it almost fell off him however he quickly recovered, tightening it's position around his waist and blushing. "K-Koushiro!" he greeted nervously.
"S-sorry! Didn't know you were getting out." Koushiro stammered as he quickly put the clothes down and picked up Jyou's wet ones. He turned to leave however his eyes wandered back to Jyou. First he noticed the scar along his ribs, and then he noticed Jyou's hand as he reached for his glasses. He stopped to stare for a minute at Jyou.
Jyou quickly put on his glasses and realized Koushiro was still in the bathroom. "I-is something wrong?"
"Jyou...your wrist.." Koushiro said slowly. Jyou's expression became grim as he looked at his wrist. There was a scar there, a scar from the cut of a knife. He remembered it well.
"..." Jyou said nothing as he walked over to the dry pile of clothes Koushiro had left for him.
"I..." Koushiro said softly, then walked out of the bathroom closing the door behind him. 'Those cuts...he couldn't of...'

Later on, in Koushiro's room, he had opened his laptop and was trying to dismiss the day's events from his mind.
'Kissing..'
Jyou joined Koushiro on the bed and wrapped his arms around him, kissing him softly on the lips.
'Jyou's father...'
"JYOU! KOUSHIRO!" he bellowed storming over to the pair.
'Crying..'
Koushiro, as soon as he got home, ran into his room, flung off his bag and jumped into his bed, sobbing bitterly. His door was left wide open, but he did not care. He had dropped his bag carelessly against his dresser and might of damaged the equipment in there however he did not care. He did not care about much of anything now.
'Jyou's wrist..'
"Jyou...your wrist.." Koushiro said slowly. Jyou's expression became grim as he looked at his wrist. There was a scar there.
'Jyou..'
"Ohayo." the sweetest voice in the world, next to that of his mother's, came out through the speaker on the phone.

Koushiro hung his head in thought. 'What next...?'

Jyou knocked on Koushiro's door nervously. Nervous. He was ALWAYS nervous. Nervous around anyone who was not Koushiro.
Except for today. Except for this moment. For the moment, his life was hanging in the balance of the consequence's of this day's events. So naturally, he was nervous like any human being who would be in his situation. For once there was a reason to be nervous.
"Koushiro?" Mrs.Izumi asked, who was carrying a tray of tea and cookies for them. 'Mrs.Izumi is being so kind to me...' Jyou thought as he glanced up at the wise, kind woman.
The door opened and Koushiro stood there for a moment, receiving the tray and turning back around, walking back to his desk and laying it neatly there.
Mrs.Izumi pushed Jyou inside gently as she closed the door behind him. VERY nervous.
Koushiro poured some tea for himself and poured some more into the other cup. Then he put the teapot down and offered Jyou his cup, the expression in his eyes hurt, unknowing, confused.
"Thank you.." Jyou whispered softly, taking the cup from Koushiro. Koushiro sat down on his bed, sipping quietly at his tea, saying nothing. Jyou took the seat near Koushiro's computer.
After awhile, the sound of sipping tea and eating of cookies unsettled Koushiro, and he spoke up. "What are you doing here?"
"Huh?" Jyou almost jumped, nearly dropping his cup. 'I guess he's nervous..' Koushiro thought.
"What are you doing here?" Koushiro repeated. His voice was emotionless, and was a poor reflection of his feelings right now. Jyou had not defended himself nor him against his father, however, here Jyou was now. "I don't understand, Jyou..."
"Understand what?" Jyou asked softly, his eyes wandering near to Koushiro's position however not up at Koushiro himself.
"Why are you here...?" Koushiro asked again, his voice ever so soft and fragile. Ever so vulnerable.
"Koushiro.." Jyou sighed softly. He placed his cup on Koushiro's desk, got up, and sat next to Koushiro on his bed. He raised his hand to look at it for a moment, and then unbuttoned the cuff that was concealing his wrist so well. When it was undone, he pulled it down.
Koushiro looked the wound over carefully, not sure of what Jyou was trying to accomplish by showing him this. Not understanding what was going on, how he felt, or what had happened today. The crest of knowledge hung around his throat and yet was powerless to help him.
"Three years ago.." Jyou started to say softly, guilt heavy in his voice. "Three years ago, I..." Jyou's mind flashed back to the face of his brother hanging over him. "I tried to kill myself."
Koushiro tensed his body at the information.
"I felt...like I had something missing in my life. Something very important to me was missing." Jyou unbuttoned the other sleeve, pulled it down, and revealed another cut wrist. "And there was something missing in my life. A person. Two people, actually."
"Two...?" Koushiro asked, his heart turning in his chest as he saw the wounded wrists.
"One was Bukamon, even though I didn't realize it at the time." Jyou grinned slightly. "Just don't tell him I said that, though..."
Koushiro chuckled softly. "You two never stop fighting, do you?"
"Hey, if two people fight they really care about eachother." Jyou stated, crossing his arms. "Guess that means I care alot about him..not like I'm going to tell him that.."
"If you and Gomamon are such close friends and you fight so much, Taichi and Yamato must be planning to get married with all their fighting!" Koushiro started to laugh.
"I can only imagine their honeymoon, rolling off a cliff throwing punches." Jyou laughed too, and for a moment the boys were able to escape today. However the concept of marriage brought them back.
"Who was the other person who was missing...?" Koushiro had a pretty good idea of who it was, however. At least, he hoped he did.
"Do you really have to ask?" Jyou asked, his hand slowly reaching out and placing itself on Koushiro's. Koushiro made no move to return the gesture, however, he did not move to pull his hand away either. 'Better than nothing I guess...' Jyou thought.
"Koushiro. For as long as I can remember, I've never done anything right in the eyes of my father." Jyou walked over to the front door of the apartment where he had left his bag, and then dragged it into Koushiro's room. He reached in and pulled out his secret box, placing it on the bed.
"What's this..?" Koushiro looked up at Jyou, who nodded, and then he reached out and pulled the lid off the box. There were papers inside, some with writing, others with pencil marks.
"My dad has always been the boss of the house. He never really loved my mother and I doubt he loves me. He acts like he doesn't even want to be in the house at times." Jyou went on to explain while Koushiro pulled out the papers, going through them.
"I've always wanted to be a marine biologist, like I told you once, since I've always loved the sea and sea animals."
Koushiro pulled out a picture of Jyou standing next to a big whale, his arm reaching out to pet the whale as though it were a pet. Well the picture was done in crayon so Koushiro was guessing at what it was supposed to be.
"And my father never accepted that. My father has never accepted anything I've wanted to do. I don't know why."
Koushiro pulled out another picture, of Jyou in a doctor's jacket, studying a fish tank while his father was nearby, checking off a list.
"I wonder if my dad always kind of suspected..."
Koushiro then pulled out a picture, one of him and Jyou together, in pencil crayon, kissing with a big heart around them. It said "Jyou Kido and Koushiro Izumi, together forever!"
"Koushiro.." Jyou placed both of his hands on Koushiro's shoulders, looking him straight in the eyes. Koushiro looked back, unsure of how to act.
"I'm sorry I didn't do anything when my father was yelling at us. I'm sorry that ever happened." Jyou's eyes were so loving and caring, his gaze so sincere...
"If..if you don't want anything to do with me anymore, I'll understand." Jyou said painfully, wincing at the idea. "But I just wanted you to know that I panicked. Not because I was ashamed of my feelings for you, not because I'm ashamed of being with you, nothing like that."
"I was afraid of my father. But not anymore." Jyou smiled, slowly, bravely. "But my fear of my father, my father period, is not worth losing you."
Koushiro felt like he was melting under Jyou's gaze, and wanted to just grab Jyou and hug him till his arms fell dead.
"I love you, Koushiro." Jyou swallowed. "I always have and I always will." Jyou's eyes were shimmering with tears. Was he afraid?
"Jyou.." Koushiro thought for a moment, then jumped Jyou, knocking him down to the bed, his arms around him, never wanting to let go.
At first Jyou was surprised by Koushiro's reaction, then he smiled happily and returned the hug. "You're not mad?"
"Quite the opposite, actually." Koushiro mumbled into Jyou's warm chest. He was right, his clothes looked better on Jyou.
"I'm glad.." Jyou whispered, laying his head back, his heart feeling light and happy after a great burden had been lifted from him.

Once again the boys were at a loss of words for each other, as there was no need for words. Just to be together, laying there like that. Eventually their eyes closed and they drifted off to sleep, content in each other's arms, to lay there for eternity just like that. In each other's arms..

Mr.Kido was looking around in his top dresser, where he kept the majority of his personal things. He was searching for something.
Jyou had left awhile ago. It was not supposed to be like this, he was trying to help Jyou, not hurt him. Yet, in his noble attempt, he had hurt him. His dear son.

He pulled out a picture. It was a picture of him, when he was about his age, with his arm wrapped around...wrapped around...
Mr.Kido wiped a tear from his eye.

They were just walking peacefully in the park, hand in hand. They had thought there was no one there, so they had risked holding hands. Nobody could see them, they were all alone in their own little world. Or so they had thought.
They had appeared from nowhere, and at first they had not noticed, and then they realized they were being followed. And surrounded.
'Why can't they just leave us alone? We've never done anything to them..' Suichirou though miserably, tightening his grip on his lover's hand.
Before he realized it, one of their attackers had pulled out a gun. It was aimed at him, before he could react-

He was shoved out of the way and he looked in horror as - "FUJITAKA!!!" Suichirou cried as Fujitaka's lifeless body fell into his arms.
Their attackers scattered away as sirens were soon heard. Suichirou clutched at Fujitaka, holding him close, sobbing.
"Fujitaka..hang on, please..don't die.." Suichirou sobbed, holding his dear Fujitaka's head in his arms. "I love you.."
Fujitaka reached a bloody hand up to touch Suichirou's cheek. "I love you..."
That hand fell down, lifeless, as Fujitaka's eyes rolled back lifeless into his head, and his body became limp.
"No..." Suichirou sobbed. "NOO!"

"Fujitaka.." Mr.Kido whispered lovingly, after all these years, he had not forgot, his heart still clung fervently to the name of the man he had loved so dearly.

And that man was taken away from him. Why? Just because they were different...

He did not want that to happen to Jyou. Which was why, ever since Jyou was little, he was dominant in his life, making Jyou's decisions for him, trying to steer him clear of the danger that lies in being true to yourself. Yet he had failed.

For as terrible as the pain of losing the one you love is, it is nowhere near knowing that your love is alive and not being to be with them.

'Jyou loves Koushiro..he always has.' Suichirou, not Mr.Kido, not Jyou's father, just Suichirou the human being though. 'Who am I to deny him that happiness?'

The next morning there was a buzz on the buzzer in Koushiro's apartment. Mrs.Izumi got up to answer it, and peeped in on Koushiro and Jyou. The two had their arms wrapped around each other, both sleeping peacefully. Mrs.Izumi smiled. She answered the buzzer.
"Moshi moshi?" she asked happily, her spirits higher than what they had been last night.
"Ohayo, Mrs.Izumi." she knew the voice, however the tone was different.
There was no need for explanation. "Come on up, Mr.Kido."
"Thank you."

Jyou opened his eyes groggily. How long had he been sleeping? His glasses were still on. 'I was so tired I forgot to take them off.' Jyou thought as he moved to get up, however he found his movement was obstructed. He looked around and saw that Koushiro had his arms wrapped around him, holding him close, not letting him go. Jyou smiled at Koushiro, stroking his hair and laid still. He did not want to wake Koushiro.
There was a knock on the door. 'Wait, if Koushiro is here...' Jyou looked around and saw a pineapple laptop. 'I must be at the Izumi house?'
The previous day's events came back to him as he heard a voice at the door.
"Ohayo." Mrs.Izumi greeted politely.
"Ohayo." that voice. That voice that almost ruined his life. That voice which had never let him breathe.
The colour drained from Jyou's face as his breath became unsteady and nervous, his arm around Koushiro grew tighter. "I don't want to lose you.." he whispered softly, stroking Koushiro's soft red hair.
"You won't..." Koushiro whispered back. Jyou looked down and realized that Koushiro's eyes were opened and worried.
"How long have you been awake..?" Jyou asked, trying to hide the worry in his voice.
"He's here, isn't he?" Koushiro asked, his grip on Jyou becoming tighter.
"Yeah..."

Jyou and Koushiro approached the living room nervously, hand in hand, being there for each other, determined not to let this man prevent them from being together.
Regardless of the consequences.

Jyou's father had his head hung. He sat in a chair of the kitchen table, saying nothing. There was a cup of coffee in front of him. It was untouched. Jyou and Koushiro sat in the chairs in front of him, not understanding the state they found this man in and afraid of what was about to transpire.

Calmly, Mr.Kido handed a picture to Jyou, which Jyou received carefully. He looked the picture over. It was a picture of two men, boys rather, with their arms around each other.
"Is this...?" Jyou asked softly.
"Fujitaka and me." Jyou's father replied.
"This..isn't.."
"A hold out of friendship? No." Jyou's father laughed bitterly. "We had started dated when we were 12 and nobody ever knew until we were 16. We were...18 in that picture."
"Father..." Jyou said softly, not sure of what to say. Koushiro squeezed Jyou's hand, letting him know that he was there for him.
"We were walking in the park, one day during the summer. Fujitaka was killed, taking a bullet shot for me." Jyou's father looked up, tears in his eyes. "Homophobics.."
Jyou's eyes widened in shock.
"Jyou..I'm so sorry, for everything. Everything I've ever done. I'm sorry.." his father said, chokingly. "Sorry for..everything.."
Chokingly?
Jyou's father suddenly collapsed, his tears flowing freely, remorse for all the years he had lost with his dearest son. Tears for his dearest love, his only love, Fujitaka.

How strange that the human race so evolved, so thoughtful and elite. So technologically advanced, supposedly the greatest of the species on planet Earth, and yet, so easily able to submit to hatred and fighting. So easily able to deny and hate things beyond the comprehension of the human mind.

Jyou could only get up and walk around to his father, and wrap an arm around him. He could not comfort him now, and he could say nothing. He could only be there for him as his father wept his tears.

Love is beautiful, hatred is terrible. A human race, so eager to claim beauty and perfection for their own, and yet, so quick to destroy beautiful things like love.

Such a shame, indeed.