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Vocabulary Key
atashi no = Posessive in the feminine. Or in other words,
a female saying "my" or "mine".
chokkan = intuition/insight.
gomen nasai = I am so sorry
nani = what
nande = why? What for?
daijobu = Two meanings. When it's a question, it means "are
you ok?", and when it's said as a phrase, it means "it's ok!"
yare = Thank God
Kami = God(s) or Guardian Spirits
kuso = I use the short form "K'so", at times. It means shit.
shimatta = Damn it!
kisama = Damn you!
(Lyssie's note: Actually, it's just a very derogatory form of 'you'.
I think it can be used to mean 'Damn you', though.)
yamero = Stop it!
I don't think I've ever seen Jyou-senpai so angry before. When he came to the digital world, he looked like a raging bull that had just seen red, and as soon as he laid eyes on Daisuke he marched over to him and grabbed him by the collar, demanding to know "what the hell happened".
Takeru, naturally, did not take to kindly to that treatment, and he screamed at Jyou that it was no one's fault, that none of us had seen this coming.
Jyou then told us that by staying overnight in the digital world we should of predicted this because it was the one possibility that was most likely, etc.
I bow my head in shame, realizing that he is right. I've been in the digital world longer than Daisuke or Miyako has, I should of thought of it! I remember Piedmon, Vandemon, all of them, and I should of realized that the odds of Ken attacking us in the middle of the night were pretty damn good!
Now Iori is gone, because of my inability to realize..
This is all my fault..
Iori, gomen nasai, I guess I really did let you down.
After all you've done for the team, for me, and I couldn't even..
A pair of arms go around my waist, and a comforting voice whispers in my ear. "It's all right, shh, it wasn't your fault."
Miyako..
I lean against my purple-haired knight in shining digital armor, sighing. "I wish I felt the same way.."
"What could of done, anyways? Stayed up all night keeping guard only to fall asleep in the morning and slow us down?"
"...." Miyako always has her way of reasoning with me.
"Have faith in Iori, he's a lot strong than what he looks, you know?" She chirps in my ear, kissing my cheek softly.
"I guess you're right...I just worry, you know me.."
"Yes I do, Ms.Worrywort angel." She giggles, nuzzling her cheek against mine, pulling me closer to her.
Worrywort angel..
That's her pet name for me. She really thinks I'm an angel..
I never would of known she thought of me if it hadn't of been for Iori.
I was leaning against the rail of the sidewalk overlooking the beach, my thoughts just coming and going on the wind.
This is what I do when I'm really worried, uptight, or what not.
Hard to believe, isn't it?
Everyone thinks I'm so confident. Everyone thinks I never worry, that I'm never afraid, that I always take charge.
Just like my brother.
Everyone expects so much of me, because I'm the little sister of the brave digidestined leader, Yagami Taichi.
So Yagami Hikari should be no different.
I'm the leader, I never cry, I'm never afraid, I never doubt, and I never keep secrets because I'm Hikari, I'm perfect, and I have no need to do anything which resembles human behaviour.
Right.
Everyne has these little fanatasies that I'm an angel and that I'm perfect, which of course leads them to forget the fact that I'm human too.
I really hate that.
There's something else I hate to.
Me and Takeru. Everyone assumes that because we've grown up together that we're automatically an item.
I was only eight when I met him and now they expect me to get married to him, almost!
All these expectations of everyone else..
They really wear on your nerves.
And I hate these expectations, each and every one of them, because they all require me to be something I'm not.
I get scared, I cry, I get doubtful of myself. Who doesn't? I'm only human.
I can't be the perfect angel of salvation everyone expects me to be.
But I guess I expect that of myself too sometimes..
To do everything right, to protect everyone else, or I'd liked to at least.
I never say anything about how I really feel, or what I think of their expectations or anything like that.
Just a mindless little girl living in her brother's shadow, and that's about it.
As far as they're concerned, and I sometimes wonder if I really do believe that myself, that I'm a mindless little girl who lives in her brother's shadow, and nothing more.
...
"Hikari-san?"
I almost jump when I hear the younger voice address me. I whirl around to see the newest digidestined crybaby before me. "H-hai, Iori?"
"Would you mind if I talked to you for awhile?"
I only say crybaby because that's what everyone expects of the youngest digidestined faced with all that danger and responsibility, that they'll break down and cry. "Certainly, Iori. What's on your mind?"
But I know better, I was the youngest once too, and I know how it feels to be labeled and stereotyped. That's why I try to treat Iori differently, because I know he is much more mature than what he looks, definately more mature than Daisuke acts. But I know I probably have my moments where I nag him like everyone else does, because he has that cold, distanced look in his eyes right now, which is the look he keeps with anyone who treats him like a baby.
Like I said, I'm only human, and I make mistakes.
"I was wondering if you could help me with a problem I'm having. You see, I'm having problems with Miyako-chan."
"Oh? You have a crush on her?" I giggled, trying to picture Iori confessing to Miyako. The truth is, I want to cry, because his feelings towards Miyako would be more accepted than my own any day of the year.
Another thing I said, I'm only human, and I have secrets that need to be kept because they're so shameful. Nobody expects the little sister of a gay brother to be gay herself.
The only difference is, Taichi has the courage to make everyone accept him and how he feels, and I wish I were so strong, because I know everyone would be shocked to find out how I really feel.
"Well, no, it's not a crush, rather I'm worried about her." Iori looked down at the ground, shuffling his feet. He seems so nervous.
"Why is that?" He doesn't have a crush? That's hard to believe. They're always together, it's a wonder they're not engaged! I just like to think like that, make myself believe that it's ok to feel like this because Miyako is obvoiusly taken, so I can torture myself all I want and I'll never have to worry about having to approach her someday in order for her to reject me because she already has someone else on her mind.
I certainly do ramble on and on when I'm upset..
"Well.." Iori sighed and looked back up at me. "Promise not to tell anyone?"
I must be learning some deep, dark secret of Miyako's, because he sounds so guilty saying this. "Of course! I promise I will not tell another soul."
"Domo.." he mutters, clutching to the railing as though it were the last thing he had to hold onto. Is he nervous? For someone who does not have a crush on Miyako, he is certainly behaving otherwise.
"Miyako-chan...Miyako-chan.." He sighed, biting his lip.
I'm dying of curiousity here! Spit it out already! Is she hurt? Is she heartbroken? Things of course which I am more than willing to help her overcome, anything for Miyako, but first I have to know what it is that's bothering her.
"Miyako-chan is a lesbian."
I feel like I've just been hit by a truck. "N-nani?"
"Miyako-chan is gay.." He repeats, looking very nervous. "We've been best friends ever since I was little, Hikari-san, and I've always known this. It doesn't bother me."
"Oh..? Then why are you worried about her?"
"She has a crush on someone, you see, and it's really killing her because she's convinced that yo - this girl has a crush on one of her male friends."
I heard that slip. I heard that slip! I think I'm going to need a cane or something the equivalent soon enough to hold me up because this info is more than able to knock me off my feet.
I kneel down to be more on his level. I bring my hand up to cover my mouth and I whisper to him: "Is she here?"
He nods slightly, still biting his lip, still nervous.
I feel bad, here's Iori, incredibly nervous about how I'm going to react to the news and here's me, wanting to jump ten feet into the air for sheer joy and then go bungee-jumping just because I feel as light as a feather.
I clear my throat. Calm down, control yourself, and don't glomp him to thank him just yet. "So who's her crush, Iori?"
Now he's nervous, shuffling, obviously being very hesitant. "Ah...well.."
I raise my eyebrows, and I have to tell myself to sit still and to not glomp him. "Well?"
"Ah...you see...you're her crush.." He utters at last, looking up at me, obviously worried.
"Oh, am I?" I get up and cross my arms, smiling happily, making sure that I do not glomp him or go try to find Miyako.
"Please don't be offended, Hikari-san, Miyako-chan is really kind and caring.."
"Oh I'm not offended, don't worry. The truth is.." I inhale, smiling to myself, half hoping and half waiting for a glomp from Miyako after I say this. "The truth is, I've never been happier, because I feel the exact same way, and whenever she's ready to see me, I'll be right here waiting for her."
My hope is fulfilled, because as soon as the sentence was uttered, I was grabbed from behind, with someone nuzzling their head against mine.
Miyako..
"Hikari-chan?"
I jump once again, realizing that my mind had been wandering off. "Hai, Miyako-chan?"
"What are you thinking about? You certainly seemed far, far away there."
"You, of course!" I giggle, turning my head to kiss my Miyako's sweet lips.
She blushed. Aww, how adorable! "But why would you want to think about me when I'm right here?"
"Good point.."
"So what were you really thinking about?"
"Just...you know, how Iori helped us get together.."
"Ah.." We have a moment of silence now, each of us thinking about Iori, and worrying about him.
Meanwhile the other digidestined are devising a plan as how to get Iori back.
More like arguing.
"How about we just storm the stupid base and get in and save Iori?!" Daisuke screeches, obviously getting fed up with being pushed around.
"No way! What if the Kaizer sees us and does something to Iori? We can't risk it!" Jyou yells back, just as upset.
Which reminds me. "Ne, Miyako-chan?"
"Hai?"
"Do you notice anything about Jyou-senpai?"
"What do you mean?"
"Well.."
"What the hell else do you suggest, Jyou?! I mean every minute that goes by we have no idea what the hell the Kaizer could be doing to Iori! While he's in there with him, we're outside bickering over a well-thought out, time consuming plan!"
"Iori deserves a bit more thought than to risk his live needlessy! We barge in there, get attacked, get killed and then nobody saves Iori! Does that make any sense to you? Dammit, Daisuke, think!"
"When I first came to the digital world, I noticed how Jyou-senpai always acted brotherly towards me and Takeru-kun because he was worried about us, considering that our own brothers were usually too busy to notice us unless we were in danger." I comment, pondering the blue-haired worrywort. "And it doesn't surprise me that he acts that way towards Iori."
"But?" Miyako fills in, realizing that there is more to it than that.
"But the way he acts sometimes seems a bit more than brotherly...just look at him now.."
"Shimatta! The hell do you want me to do, Jyou!? I'm not superman! We don't have that many digimon that can shinka, you know, we're kind of limited in our options here! Either we ram the joint or we don't!"
"How about you devise an attack plan and someone sneaks in to save Iori? Ever think of that, smartass?"
"You notice it too?" Miyako asks me softly.
"Ah...so it's not just me."
"Hikari-chan...do you think Jyou-senpai.." She doesn't complete her thought, because she seems a bit concerned.
"Jyou-senpai has a heart of gold, Miyako-chan." I inform her, trying to come to terms with the idea myself. One person who has notions about couples is usually wrong, however if two people notice it, then there is definately something going on. "He would never hurt Iori, and he is definately not perverted. I think if he does have...feelings for Iori, then he can be trusted to not say anything or even then not go too far."
"It's not that I'm worried about.." She sighed, pulling me closer for comfort. "I'm more worried about how everyone else will react, not to mention the entire world."
"I think he would keep it under wraps, knowing him. Jyou-senpai is no fool.."
"Oh fuck it!" The sudden scream of rage snaps us both to attention as we dart our eyes forward.
Just as Jyou-senpai begins to march off towards the Kaizer's base, where Iori is, with Daisuke cursing at his back.
"Go get yourself killed, then! See if I care!!!"
I blink. Jyou-senpai is kind, patient, smart and sensible. He is always the first to disagree to just rushing up to an enemy and attacking.
However there he goes, marching off towards the base to get Iori back.
"Hikari-chan, you said something about Jyou-senpai not being a fool just now?" Miyako giggled in my ear.
"Well...love does defy all logic, you know." I turn around and wrap my arms around her neck. "After all, you did fall in love with a weirdo like me, right?"
"Well if you're a weirdo then I'm definately a hermit." She smiles, pressing her lips to mine.
Ah, sheer bliss it is, to be kissed by Inoue Miyako, or at least for me. So we stand there, hugging, kissing, being close.
All the while Daisuke is cursing at Jyou with Takeru trying to calm him down.
And Jyou is marching off to face the Kaizer to get his little love back, obviously prepared to kill with his bare hands.
I guess anyone who falls inlove is a fool, and a happy one at that.
Until I remember..
That's what he said, he said I can stay here until I remember.
Remember what? What's to remember?
Am I supposed to remember what a jerk he's been to the digimon, how badly he treats his own digimon Wormon, how cruel and vicious he is?
Is that what I'm supposed to remember?
But then...he kissed me...why on Earth did he kiss me? I know for a fact that I have never given him a hint of liking him. On the contrary, the hints I've given him about my feelings towards him are quite the opposite.
I hate him! I hate what he's done, I hate how he acts, I hate how he treats others and I hate how selfish he is.
But...is that true?
After he kissed me I'm not so sure.
Do I love him?
But what about Jyou-senpai?
It can't be love, it can't be..
I don't think it is, because I just tested it. Thinking about Jyou-senpai and kissing in the same line of thought makes me blush, so I know for a fact that I still love Jyou-senpai.
I can't love Ken, nay, I can't love the Digimon Kaizer, it makes no sense!
Before all this happened I was certain that I hated him with a passion!
And thinking about that kiss..
There was nothing enjoyable or loving about that kiss, at least not to me.
But he said that he loved me..
How can he love someone he doesn't even know?
He kissed me...and he said I can't leave until I remember him..
Remeber what..?
You can't love someone you don't even know..
Then maybe..
Maybe he knows me and I just don't realize that.
Maybe we met before all this and I didn't realize it was him.
"Ah..well..I'm Hida Iori! See, now you know me, so now you don't have to be lonely anymore, right?" I said cheerfully to the older boy, smiling up at him.
He just seems so sad, so I'm trying to cheer him up! After all, Papa said that there is nothing more cruel than to leave a lonely person alone.
So if I keep him company, I'll be following Papa's advice and then he'll be proud of me!
So all I have to do is make this boy smile!
But I wonder why he's so sad anyways?
"I'm Ken.." He said softly, his eyes never leaving the ground. What's so interesting about the ground, anways?" "Ichijouji Ken.."
My eyes snap open after that little flashback.
That's right! We did meet when we were younger! We were actually friends for awhile when we were younger..
"Well it's nice to meet you!" I replied, shaking his hand.
He's blushing when I do. Why would he do that? It makes no sense to blush when someone is just trying to be nice to you. Must be a big kid thing.
"Ah...nice to meet you.." he replies softly again, still staring at the ground.
Just because I have to know what he's looking at, I start looking at the ground too.
I'm staring for awhile, trying to figure out what's so fun about doing it, until he taps my shoulder. "Are you ok?"
"I'm fine! I was just trying to find what you were looking at."
He's looking at me like I'm crazy now. That's not too good, is it? "What I was looking at..?"
"Well you kept staring at the ground so I thought you were looking at something, so I started to look for what it was that you kept looking at 'cuz you look like you like whatever it is you're looking at!" I reply cheerfully, still looking at the ground, and I still haven't found what it is he was looking at.
Until he laughs. Why is he laughing? "What's so funny?" I ask, wondering what's so funny.
"You!" he giggles, smiling at me.
"Me? What I do?" We just met and he's making fun of me?
"I wasn't really looking at anything on the ground.." he scratches the back of his head. "But I just thought it was funny how you thought I was!"
"Ah...ok.." I reply, blinking at him. Big kids make no sense to me. Ah well. "Ne, let's go play on the swingset!"
He doesn't really have a choice as I drag him along with me by his hand.
After what seems like forever of playing tag, hide and go seek, and all those other fun games that kids our age play, we finally settle down on the swings like we were supposed to in the first place.
We swing for awhile, until he starts talking.
"Iori, do you have a big brother?"
"Nope." I blink. "Why, do you?"
"Yeah...he's really smart. His name is Osamu."
"Osamu? Never heard of him."
"Are you sure?" he seemed surprised. "He's very smart and popular, everyone admires him for being so smart."
"Well I don't." I blink. "Because I've never heard of him!"
At first he seems really surprised, and then he smiles. "Good, I'm glad."
"Oh? Why's that? I think it'd be cool to be related to someone who's really popular. Is he a movie star or something?"
"No...not really." He seems sad again. Oh no, I made him depressed even after I was trying to cheer him up! I can be so stupid sometimes.. "It's not cool being related to someone who's popular, especially not Osamu."
"Oh? Why's that..?"
"Because I'm not as smart or as strong or as famous as Osamu.." He said sadly, choking on the words a little. Wait, is he crying? "Because I'm not as good as him, people tend to forget I exist. My own Mama and Papa love him and not me!"
I was right, he is crying, because I can see little drops of water going down his cheeks. "Aww...your Mama and Papa suck if that's true!"
He looks up at me, and he seems pretty surprised. "What do you mean?"
"Mamas and Papas are always supposed to love their kids, and if they don't that just means that they're big meanies!" I frown, biting my lip, trying not to yell. How could any Mama and Papa not love their own kid? That's just cruel, that's what my Papa would say.
"...You really think so?" He asks me, sniffling a little. I think he's stopped crying now.
"Of course!"
"...." He looks sad, again. Geeze, is this kid ever happy? I'll have to stay with him forever if I ever plan to impress my Papa. "I guess that just means that my Mama and Papa are meanies and that nobody loves me.."
"That's not true! I love you!"
He looks shocked again. That and I think he's blushing. "N-nande?!"
"If your parents are just meanies that are too stupid to love you then I'll love you instead!" I smile at him. Yeah, that should work, that way he'll be happy and then I can make Papa proud of me!
"D...demo, we just met."
"So?"
"Ah...well isn't that a bit soon to say you love someone?"
Big kids, go figure. The simplest and easiest answer just isn't good enough for them. "Well, how about this, I'll just stay with you forever and love you so that you can be happy again!" I offer him my hand. "You have nothing to lose, right?"
"Well.." He looks my hand up and down, like I grew a third thumb or something. "I guess so.."
"So c'mon! Let's shake on it and make it official!"
"I guess so.." and he shakes my hand, finally!
"So it's settled!" I smile again, shaking his hand firmly. "We'll be together forever so you'll be happy again!"
So that's what happened...so he must think that I...that I..
Oh Ken, I didn't mean it like that! I was only six, and I had no idea about what I was saying, I was just trying to cheer you up..
And I did, I think..
After that happened, we played together everyday and we became good friends. He seemed happy again.
We were together for a few months before his parents decided to move away..
And when he did, I never saw him again.
Not until today, or at least as far as I knew, not until today.
I roll over in the bed and start to furiously beat up the pillow there. Baka, baka, baka! How could I of forgotten such an important thing?!
He must think...he must really think..
No wonder he was blushing! He took it the wrong way!
Oh no..
...
What am I going to do..
Why did I forget..
Wait...if I was six when I met him...then..
It was probably right before my father died. No wonder I forgot..
Anything that happened before my father died I forgot, because it was too painful to remember..
...Father..
What should I do, father?
I don't love Ken, not the way he wants me to..
But maybe I could get through to him..
Maybe I could make him stop being the Kaizer.
Maybe I could learn to love him and help him turn out for the better..
But..
But that would mean..
That would mean that I would have to give up Jyou-senpai.
Well, not so much give up him, rather just give up my feelings for him..
And I don't really want to do that..
Kami...what should I do..
What should I do..
"Iori!"
I jump in my sleep, which forces me to wake up.
Baka, I must of fallen asleep!
I was waiting for Ken to come back so I could talk to him.
But what would I say...
"Iori!"
Now I'm even dreaming that I can hear Jyou-senpai's voice calling to me...I wish it would, I wish he were here, I need his advice..
"Iori!"
I'm not sure how well that would go over, asking Jyou-senpai whether I should choose him over Ken or Ken over him.
"Iori! Iori! Where are you, Iori?!"
Now I'm hallucinating that I'm hearing Armadimon's voice? Wait a minute, I'm awake, how much could I possibly hallucinate?
"Iori! Please if you're here answer me! Please.."
That couldn't be.. "Jyou-senpai?"
"IORI! Yare! Where are you?!"
It is him! "Here, I'm here!" I call, jumping out of my bed and running to the door of my bedroom that Ken walked through just a few hours ago.
Ken...I ponder him for a minute until I hear Jyou-senpai calling for me again. "Iori, where are you!?"
"Here!" I begin to pound on the door, which is sounding a great deal like my heart right now, which is pounding with anxiety and happiness that Jyou-senpai came for me.
He came for me. He actually came! Why would he do a thing like this for me anyways? He even has Armadimon with him! Why, why would he risk it? He could of been killed or worse coming here to rescue me.
Like a knight in shining armor.
I blush, picturing Jyou-senpai as a knight...ah, BAKA! Don't think about that now, this is serious!
"Iori! Are you alright?" He screams through the door, pounding on it.
"Hai, I'm fine!" I reply. Well, I'm not, the truth is my heart is feeling pretty torn between you and Ken however I'm not going to get into that right now.
"Yare.." He whispers, I can barely hear him through the thick wood of the door, but I can just imagine his fingers touching it, and I lift my fingers to do the same, trying to touch him without his knowing.
Kami, Jyou-senpai, I wish so badly to reach out to you for comfort right now because I really don't know what to do.
"K'so, I can't see a lock or anything on this door." He hisses, sounding extremely uptight. Was he upset over me..? "Can you see a handle or anything on your side of the door, Iori?"
I look quickly, realizing that there is nothing there. That is probably why I did not try to escape on my own in the first place because I had it figured the Kaizer would do something like this. Funny how I call him the Kaizer now that Jyou-senpai is around, after having of remembered so much about him. "I can't see anything, Jyou-senpai.."
"Shimatta!" He curses, pounding on the door. Why is he so upset..? Is it just over me, or am I only imagining it?
We stand for a minute, I'm lost in my predicament and I have no idea what Jyou-senpai is doing. Ken or Jyou, Ken or Jyou? Even then, only one of them is guaranteed to accept me, but even then..
"Iori, Jyou, stand back!" Armadimon quickly orders us.
"What for?" Jyou snaps, which causes me to cringe. Why the heck is he so moody?
"I'm going to break the door down, now stand back!" Armadimon orders again, a bit of a snarl in his voice.
I'm causing so much trouble for them...I ponder this while I move as far away from the door as possible.
"Rolling Stone!" Armadimon announces his attack, throwing himself at the door.
Which moves, but does not break down.
"Rolling Stone!" Another brave attempt at the door, and once again it is unsuccessful.
"It's not working.." I can hear Jyou-senpai comment softly. "But we have to get you out of there, Iori, we just have to.."
Why is he doing this anyways? Why did he risk himself for me..?
"Rolling Stone!" Once again, the door moves but does not break under Armadimon's relentless attacks.
"..." I can hear Armadimon panting. He's trying so hard to help me, and knowing this is only bringing on the guilt.
"ROLLING STONE!!!!!" Armadimon finally screams, throwing himself at the door again, breaking through it and rolling right up to my feet.
I think I could cry. It's only been a whole day that I've been here in this base, but this whole day has been sheer agony, at least for me. "Armadimon!"
He unrolls from his tight position and pounces on me, smiling happily. "Iori!!"
I laugh and smile, hugging him. "It's so good to see you, Armadimon!"
"It feels like it's been forever, Iori!"
For the minute we chatter happily, almost on the verge of tears. I guess the armadillo means more to me than what I thought.
I'm oblivious to the current situation for a few brief seconds before Jyou-senpai clears his throat. "We should go."
"Jyou-senpai.." I look up at him, deep into those serious eyes that I adore, that I want so badly to look at me and only me. Eyes which can shake me to the core with any expression that they give. "Jyou-senpai, it was so dangerous of you to come here alone, even if you were with Armadimon. Why did you risk it..?"
His eyes darken and flick away, refusing to meet mine. "We'll talk about it later, let's just get out of here!"
"But I want to discuss it now, Jyou-senpai." A cold, icy voice impersonates me, appearing suddenly from the darkness.
Jyou-senpai gasps as he matches his eyes with that of a cruel genius's.
There he is, Ichijouji Ken, the Digimon Kaizer himself, standing where the door used to be.
"Well, aren't you going to answer him?" Ken asks Jyou-senpai, a cruel smile on his face.
"What the hell do you want from him?" Jyou-senpai replies, going on the defensive. "Why did you ambush them just to get Iori? What's your purpose for him?"
"My purpose?" this arouses laughter from him. "My purpose? You sound so cold, Jyou-senpai!" He sneers again, viciousness is dripping from his voice like venom everytime he says "Jyou-senpai".
"Stop playing games with me and tell me!" Jyou commands him, trying to use his seniority over Ken.
But Ken is not convinced. Seeing him face to face is making me call him Ken again. "I think your 'purpose' for Iori would be much more interesting to hear than mine."
"What the hell do you mean?"
"He asked you himself, don't you think he deserves an answer, Jyou-senpai?" Ken asks Jyou again, that venom still painfully evident in his voice. "Why did you risk your life to save him? You know that I rather despise trespassers, especially when they are trespassing for the purposes for the stealing. That just really pisses me off, you know?"
"He's my friend, kisama! I wouldn't abandon him to the likes of you, unlike the rest of those bakas." Jyou-senpai growls, seeming to be rather pissed off himself, and growing.
"Is that all?" Ken moves his gaze from Jyou-senpai to me, his eyes are so dark that it causes me to shiver. "You only see this little angel as a friend?"
"Of course...why should I see him as anything else?"
"You fool...you don't even know.." Now he's looking down at his hand, and I gasp when I realize he's holding onto his digivice. "You don't even know...what it is that I want so badly is what you have and you don't even know, you fool.."
I bite my lip. Ken..
"And you think that I'm going to let you walk out of here with that little angel when you don't even know how he feels?" Ken hisses. "Not fucking likely, asshole!"
Oh no. What's he going to do? Ken, what are you going to do?
He raises his digivice in the air.
Kami, please, no, don't tell me he's going to attack Jyou-senpai?!
"Attack, Cl-"
"Yamero!" I cry out suddenly, running and then throwing myself at Ken. "Yamero, kudasai, Ken!"
He looks down at me suspiciously. "Why should I?"
"Don't do it, please!"
"Why the hell not?" He growls, his dark gaze is piercing my very soul, and I know it, but I can't let it stop me. Not now, not this time.
"Let him go, Ken!"
"Nande?"
"Because...if you do, I'll stay here with you." I reply softly, taking a deep breath. "Just like I promised to. I'll stay with you if you let Jyou-senpai go."
"You what..?" He seems very surprised.
"Iori, what are you doing?!?" Jyou-senpai yells at me.
"Stop it, Iori! Step away from him!" Armadimon barks at me.
"If you let him go, I'll stay with you." I repeat firmly, ignoring the please of Armadimon and Jyou-senpai.
Ken wraps an arm around me, pulling me closer to him. I don't resist, despite how much I want to, and I'm almost ready to lean up to kiss him because I think that's what he's doing, but he does something completely different instead.
"You love him that much?" He whispers in my ear.
"Hai.." I reply sadly, feeling tears whelm up in my eyes. "But I'll stay with you if that's what it takes to save him."
"...." What he does next almost makes me jump. He puts his hands on my shoulders, pushes me a little away from him and..
He kisses my forehead.
Wait, why would he do that?
"Go on, then." He orders me, turning away from me. "You can go the same way Jyou came here or you can just leave by the front doors. The guards won't stop you unless I order them to. I suggest you leave before I do that."
"But, Ken-" I about to argue that I am willing to stay with him to make him happy again. I may not love him, but I realize now that I don't hate him, and I certainly care about the childhood we shared.
"JUST GO!" He barks, refusing to look at me.
Stunned and shocked, I quickly turn to leave the room with Armadimon and Jyou-senpai, who is more than puzzled by the sudden mercy of Ken, however he seems more than ready to go.
As I'm leaving with them, well running actually, I turn back just to see what Ken's doing..
Only to see that he's watching me leave with tears going down his cheeks.
Needless to say, my heart is heavy in my chest as I go.
It's been awhile since we left the base, and we're just walking around.
We haven't met up with the others yet. Actually, I've just been following Jyou-senpai around because I'm too lost in my own thoughts to seriously consider to watch where I'm going.
And after an hour of walking around, it's dawning on me that Jyou-senpai is purposely avoiding the others. I don't know why, and right around now I don't really care.
I don't know what to think after all that.
It's only been a day, and yet it feels like it's been months, even a year, that it all happened in.
I sigh, because I can't get the imagine of the sobbing Digimon Kaizer out of my mind.
Poor Ken...if only, if only..
But it's too late for "if"s, isn't it?
"Iori." Jyou-senpai finally stops and turns around to look at me, and I can tell he is because I see his feet turn.
See, I've developed an obsession with the ground, and I refuse to take my eyes off it. "Hai?"
"It's not your fault."
Well, gee, Jyou-senpai, is that the best advice you can give? "I know." No, I don't know that, as a matter of fact I've spent this past hour convincing myself that it is my fault but I just don't want you to worry about me. Well I do, but I just don't want to have to explain to you exactly what happened back there.
"I don't know what happened back there, but it's not your fault." What a stupid thing to say, that's just like saying "I've never tasted peanut butter but I know it tastes bad", or something equally foolish.
"...." Why should I reply? What should I say?
"You shouldn't be sad over a decision he made himself, Iori."
"I guess you're right.."
"Iori...this is probably bad timing, but I think we need to get this out in the air so we can finally breathe.."
This I wasn't expecting, so I actually look up. "What?"
He kneels down in front of me, meeting my gaze. I hate the fact that he's doing that, because it only reminds me of how much I love him, and thinking of that reminds me of how much I just hurt Ken, which in turn reminds me of how bad I feel over that.
"I heard what Ken said to you."
Oh, that. Great, just great. First I hurt Ken, and now Jyou-senpai. But that's ok because he is probably about to break my heart so it's all good. All the colour drains out of my face, of course, and I'm quite willing to faint right here and now. I bow my head, not meeting his gaze again, because I don't want him to see the tears that I feel have just started to roll down my cheeks. "Oh.." I sniffle, choking back a sob. "You did, did you.."
"Iori.." He says gently, reaching his hand up to brush away my tears, and then he curls it under my chin, forcing me to look him in the eyes. "I'm not offended, if that's what your afraid of."
That, and being totally rejected, which is what I'm expecting right now. "You're not..?"
"No...it's just...it's going to be a long wait, Iori, before we could tell anyone.."
"N-nani?" I can't think of a better way to put it, what the heck is he talking about?
"Homosexuality, let alone odd couples like us, are not exactly welcomed by society as you probably know." He looks so thoughtful...so sincere...but what the heck is he saying is what I'm dying to know. "But I think that if we really love each other we'll be able to manage. We'll have moments, but they won't be often, and we'll definately have to hide this from everyone else, even Miyako, you understand?"
No, I don't, because I'm too busy gaping at him. He can't possibly be saying what I think he's saying, is he? I'm too shocked to speak.
"Ok..?" He whispers, leaning his head towards mine.
Kami, he's not going to - he does!
He presses his lips to mine, and he kisses me.
Like I said, I'm ready to faint.
Some minutes later, when he finally pulls away - but don't mistake it, I really wouldn't mind if he didn't pull away, but sadly we need to breathe - and he smiles at me, his eyes shining with happiness. I think it's happiness. Oh dammit I'm too happy to tell! "I love you." He whispers, pulling me into an embrace.
And before I know it, I'm crying, my tears being a poor reflection of how I'm really feeling right now.
"I love you too, Jyou-senpai.."